Desperate Cry

While I may not remember what it is that I am reading, I am trusting the Lord God that His Word still is getting into my spirit – and changing me from the inside-out.

Even though I couldn’t tell you word for word Psalm 142:1-2 is about, I do know this chapter is about desperately crying out to the Lord God for mercy when it seems like no one cares. Such a Psalm is home hitting for so many of us. So, I just wanted to share this Psalm today. As I am broken and withdrawing from everyone, I just want to share this Psalm.

Psalm 142

I cry aloud to the Lord; I plead aloud to the Lord for mercy. I pour out my complaint before Him; I reveal my trouble to Him. Although my spirit is weak within me, You know my way. Along this path I travel they have hidden a trap for me. Look to the right and seeL no one stands up for me; there is no refuge for me; no one cares about me.

I cry You, Lord; I say, “You are my shelter, my portion in the land of the living.” Listen to my cry, for I am very weak. Rescue me from those who pursue me, for they are too strong for me. Free me from prison so that I can praise Your name. The righteous will gather around me because You deal generously with me.

This Psalm meets me where I am. I wish, I could explain where I am as far as my mental health. I can’t keep running from everything. And that’s what I have been doing. The Scripture I can hear most right now is: “Do not have other gods besides me (see Deuteronomy 6:14, Jeremiah 35:15).”

My Routine

I have allowed myself to get too comfortable for things within my control. I could spend time with our Lord Jesus Christ in other ways. Ways that do not “cost” a lot of energy –

  1. Worship music
  2. Enjoy His Presence
  3. Listen to the Bible
  4. Listen to a sermon

    Morning Routine is what comes to mind, so that’s where I want to start – as I confess my sins and repent. I want to start over, and make this a week of honestly seeking His beautiful face. I would like my morning routine to begin something like this:

  • Listen to chapter in Bible
  • Journal for few minutes
  • Pray. Really pray and spend time with the Lord asking for His help
  • Memorize Scripture
  • Take a short walk, as you give this day to the Lord
  • Participate as you listen to worship music

    Psalm 142 isn’t where we are in the Reading Plan today, but it’s where my heart is drawing me and I am going to allow the Word of our Lord to wash over my achy, depressed, anxious, PTSD heart.

Fog of Depression

I have greatly struggled with depression this past month. I am not sure it could be narrowed down to any one specific factor. There are many things, which can cause one’s mental illness to “flare up”. When undergoing trials, the holidays can become a difficult season. The holidays can bring up many emotions, regardless of life circumstances.

Wherever you are, I see you. As I face my own struggles, I see you. I see you and I want to encourage each of you, so you don’t go through this time feeling isolated or alone.


Depression can become quite thick around this time of year. I don’t know where you are, but I want to encourage you to press on. All the while, I am trying to encourage my own self to press on.

How so? For myself, I just finished reading the book of Genesis. I seem to do well pressing on in my Bible reading right now. My prayer life is where I seriously need to see growth.

In Genesis 22, God instructed Abraham to give his son Isaac in sacrificial worship. His precious, long-awaited, son needed to be fully given to God. But, would Abraham trust God… love God, even here? Will you and I surrender?


‘Sometime later God tested Abraham. He said to him, “Abraham!” “Here I am,” he replied. Then God said, “Take your son, your only son, whom you love—Isaac—and go to the region of Moriah. Sacrifice him there as a burnt offering on a mountain I will show you.

. . . ”The angel of the Lord called to Abraham from heaven a second time and said, “I swear by myself, declares the Lord, that because you have done this and have not withheld your son, your only son, I will surely bless you . . . because you have obeyed me.”’

~ See Genesis 22


As I am reminded of Abraham’s great act of surrender, I know, there are many things I need to surrender to the Lord Jesus in my own life. When I willfully give my circumstances to our great God, He will take care of them. I need to give God each day and keep trying to dig into His Word – despite the trials I face. I have been talking a lot about that, in my daily Bible checkup time on Instagram | Facebook.

My goal behind the daily Bible checkup time is: to help each of us to fight back in our battles and read our Bible’s (and pray) – even when it is hard.

But they delight in the law of the Lord,
    meditating on it day and night.
3They are like trees planted along the riverbank,
    bearing fruit each season.
Their leaves never wither,
    and they prosper in all they do.

Psalm 1:2-3, New Living Translation

How about you – dear friend? What do you need to surrender to the Lord Jesus today? How are you struggling and in need of prayer or encouragement?

Featured image: Markos Mant

Forever His,
Stace

Fighting Purposeless(ness)

 

We each face seasons in our lives, where life gets. . . well, messed up. Maybe, you are there right at this very moment. And you find yourself wondering how you will fight. Oh friend, I have been there this week!! It is easier to think about giving up or the alternative to this life.

Esther is taught by Mordecai, her uncle and caretaker, that God made her for this precise moment.

If you keep quiet at a time like this, deliverance and relief for the Jews will arise from some other place, but you and your relatives will die. Who knows if perhaps you were made queen for just such a time as this?” (Esther 4:14, NLT)

While our dilemmas often aren’t life or death, God will meet us here regardless of our circumstances and give us a big glimpse of His purpose for our lives!


Many of us are there right now, where we are facing difficult days, trials, deep discouragement, depression, or feeling of purposelessness. We have all been there in some way.

Maybe even facing the reality of suicidal thoughts. So, I know some of us really have faced life or death decisions.


Friend, God created you with a divine purpose in mind, and no situation (or situations) can rob us of that!!

It has taken me 7 years to find some sort of God given purpose for this season of my life (living with life interfering chronic illness).

In all honesty, I think it was something He told me long ago. I just wrestled with it – and maybe even refused to accept its importance. Some days, I still don’t “feel” the purpose. I was there this week, but I think this is when Christian community really can show up. This is when it is the most important thing to seek our Risen Lord through the Bible and prayer.


Our great God, sent His precious son Jesus Christ to save us!

He came to deliver each and every one of us from difficult and frustrating things. And He came to give us hope and be with us through our pain. While sin destroyed our relationship with Him, Jesus came to reconcile us to our heavenly Father.

This is no ordinary thing to be reconciled to God. He is going to do amazing things through you, my friend!

Hang in there, and keep seeking His face. He will show you the purpose He has given you!


A few verses come to mind, as I write this blog.

And I want to share them to give hope. The Lord will hold onto you fiercely, because of His love for you. Come running to Him, while you still can. Even with the trials and desperation we face, God is going to do some marvelous things in our midst – if we will turn to Him!

I give them eternal life, and they will never perish, and no one will snatch them out of my hand (John 16:11, ESV).

For the Lord God is a sun and shield; the Lord bestows favor and honor. No good thing does he withhold from those who walk uprightly (Psalm 84:11).

Unsplash photo by Ivy Barn.

In Him,
Stacey

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Surviving Summer Struggles

Lately, I have profoundly struggled. It is in different areas, from mental health to Dysautonomia and others. Combine everything, and it can make or break my focus. By focus, I mean my special time with Jesus.

I feel the weight of my trials in my focus. I find myself in a whirl of distractions – keeping me from our Risen Lord. Things that keep my heart from wanting to seek Him. The sin? From wanting to seek Him. This realization is a big step – the most important one.

Confessing my sin to my Beloved Savior Jesus Christ and trusting Him – is what will bring forth the healing.

The Spiritual Truth Behind It

These troubles come to prove that your faith is pure. This purity of faith is worth more than gold, which can be proved to be pure by fire but will ruin. But the purity of your faith will bring you praise and glory and honor when Jesus Christ is shown to you (1 Peter 1:7, NCV).

Our troubles will show us where our faith is. We each face this struggle of seeing how close our struggles bring us to Christ, or draw us away. How will our circumstances be impacted by our faith in Jesus Christ? Or vice versa?

As I pull my heart, mind, and body toward pursuing Christ, I want to share some of the best ways to fight through these Summer times. Each spiritual activity will help build up our faith when we need it the most.

How to Fight Through My Summer Struggles?

Being prayerful.

Prayer is essential. Connecting with God is the glue. When we pray, God absolutely shows up and touches everything. While He may not remove our situations, He will give us strength and peace to carry us through.

In this song, When We Pray, we are reminded that the world is changed by the Church’s prayers. Prayer is a needed ministry not only for others, but for our own lives too!

Listen to the Bible.

Let’s actively listen to God’s Word, making Him our “go to” for Someone to listen to. Many of us hate being alone, so listening to God’s Word is the perfect sound!

Using YouVersion has helped me to simply listen to the Bible. I am reminded that I can choose to listen to the Bible, versus Netflix for a hour or so. But as I listen, my heart is turned closer to my God.

Two recommended reading plans:

Listen to praise music.

Like many, I spend a lot of time on YouTube. and recently discovered some encouraging videos. This discovery helps me worship as I listen and utilize the on screen verses. Also: I have my own playlists.

Christian Support.

We need followers of Christ to confide in. We need people who will pray for us, and check on us. Understanding individuals who will love us where we are, and help us when we are weary.

Featured image by Aleksandr Eremin.

Immeasurably More in My Days

Some days, I just want to go home. Have you ever felt this way? Sick of this world and ready to receive Heaven in all our Lord’s glory?

Today’s blog post is simply part of my story. My longing for my eternal home, while realizing God still has me here for a big purpose – even when I don’t see it “in the moment”. Because God sent His Son Jesus Christ, I can trust the purpose even if I don’t “feel” it (see Phil. 1:21-24).

Honestly some days, I am really sick of this world and just the stuff of this life. As I reflect on my day, I realize this to be true.

I am so thankful for the things God has got me through today. He has chosen to deliver me from so much.

I saw a new doctor today who shared advice for ailments she didn’t understand. It was hard explaining emotional things to a doctor who didn’t lift her eyes from her notes. Then add in a flare up. There you have my Tuesday.

I need God to do immeasurably more. And I need to trust that He will, because He already has!


“Now to Him who is able to [carry out His purpose and] do superabundantly more than all that we dare ask or think [infinitely beyond our greatest prayers, hopes, or dreams], according to His power that is at work within us… (Eph. 3:20, AMP).”

I want this “immeasurably more” that our generous God has to offer us, as Christ followers!


(1) God keeps leading me, and that too is immeasurably more in my life. He leads me, even when my body and mind make life difficult.

(2) God does immeasurably more, even when doctor appointments with three new primaries in a row – just doesn’t work out.

(3) God works things out, even when my fingers and toes become numb from taking a walk to seek nourishment.

(4) God is working in my storm, even when I am increasingly anxious about an upcoming appointment.

(5) I don’t know what the future holds. I pray God works out our finances and many other unknowns in my life. But, I have to choose to operate based on trusting the God of the Universe. I know only God can control all these things. I have spent a lot of time fighting for the kind of control only God can have. So, I am choosing to put my trust in the Lord Jesus Christ and continue to reread Proverbs 3:5-10.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart.
    Do not depend on your own understanding.
In all your ways obey him.
    Then he will make your paths smooth and straight (vv. 5-6, NIRV).”


Lord Jesus, I need Your immeasurably more in every single area of my life. Please increase Your activity in my life, and help me to see how You are working out everything for my ultimate good. Please, give me hope and keep me well nourished in my relationship with You. Amen.

Featured image by Robin Noguier.